53 and now a family!

Jdrake

New Member
Hi everyone, I am a 53 year old man who had given up hope of having love and a family. I am now desperately in love with a lovely woman who is 30 and has 3 kids! I am so excited to have a chance to have a family and be a dad (their dad is out of the picture). I am worried I am to old to learn how to be a dad! Their ages are 8,7, and almost 3. Any advice?
 

jason

Administrator
Staff member
Welcome and congratulations. My biggest piece of advice is to relax. You will fall into father mode over time.
 

Jdrake

New Member
Thanks

I know that I should relax. It just seems like there is so much that I do not understand about kids. You are right though with time I am sure I will learn a lot.
 

Lefty

New Member
It'll work itself out for you. Just let her take the lead for a while and ask if you are unsure. Since they will be step children, you really need to sit down with your intended and figure out how much responsibility you need to assume with parenting.
 

jason

Administrator
Staff member
I know that I should relax. It just seems like there is so much that I do not understand about kids. You are right though with time I am sure I will learn a lot.
I am still learning as I go. I am sure I will always be learning. Part of what makes children great I think.
 

Kevin

New Member
Congratulations!. The only word of advice I have for you is to be slow and considerate of your wife's wishes. My sister is a widow and had a similar situation. I've seen how things can become very confusing if not dealt with carefully. The kids need time to get to know you and build a relationship with you, especially the older ones. Give them that time.
 

Ramblin' Ron

New Member
Some kids can be really touchy about having "another Dad". You really need to go slow and easy and be patient with all of you, yourself included. Fathering isn't a natural thing. The male of the species was made to mate, get the female impregnated and leave on to the next female. Over the ages, I believe human males have learned to parent better than we were made for but it does take some time. The hard part is the patience.
 
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