Double Standard?

[flfsurveyor]

Have you noticed that we encourage our sons to go after girls even when they're still 7 , yet we tell our daughters not to entertain boys till they are 12?

We seem to treat our children differently based on their sex.

How do you think this treatment will affect them as they grow up?

 

[BigDaddy]

It is a double standard but it seems to be culturally accepted. In Japan for example boys are encouraged to focus on studies and girls are encouraged to seek the attention of boys.

 

[Niceness8000]

I personally wouldn't encourage my son to pursue girls if he's only seven years old. That's too young. Boys will develop a natural interest in girls as their hormones kick in. Why distract them with that while they may not be thinking about it? Obviously, as a man, you know how men think in regards to women. It kills a man to realize that other men will look at their daughters and think those same things. It's not necessarily a double standard. Males are predatory and females are the prey. You want to protect your own if you view them as vulnerable.

 

[Sinbian]

I simply am not smart enough to answer this question. I just know that when people asked me to talk to girls when I was a kid I was terribly uncomfortable.

 

[Don]

A little boy was suspended from my son's class last year for kissing a girl, so I have not encouraged my son to go after any girls. Thankfully, so far he only has interest in dinosaurs and Spider Man.

 

[writer811]

I have noticed this, actually. Even when I was that age I noticed my parents doing the same thing with me and my siblings. They were encouraging me to go after girls from the time I was thirteen. My sister and stepsister weren't allowed to date until they were eighteen and they thought all other parents should follow their example. That never made any sense to me because what do they expect me to do? Date and eighteen year old while I'm thirteen? My parents weren't the brightest.

 

[Foster]

I wont be encouraging my son's to pursue at all. They will know when they are ready to do so and won't need me to force them in to it.

 

[erin]

As a mother I want my son to stay away from girls forever but that's unreasonable. There is a double standard and it's best that girls learn that when they are young because that's the way the world works.

 

[JRDeep]

It's conditioning. We end up conditioning girls to be timid around boys they may like, because we want our sons to be the aggressors when it comes to finding a mate. That's how it is. It's a formula that works. May not be fair, but oh well.

 

[Andersson]

We never had this issue either but then again I think I might be a little older than some of you others here and our kids were born in another "era". Our son was petrified of girls until he was about 16, when he could drive. The girl always had crushed but nothing major until she was out of school.

 

[Jeremy Green]

Yeah I think that's just the way our society works. We feel comfortable with boys because they seem stronger, yet we want girls to take it slow because we know how fragile they can be. This is funny because some girls are stronger than boys, so I think they both should have the same rights.

 

[themdno]

I wouldn't encourage or discourage them, unless something was going too far. I wouldn't mind if my daughter had a "boyfriend" at 7 or 8 years old, because it's just kids being kids, and imitating adults.

 

[ghanashyam]

The double standards are justified. Girls have different biology and the parents have to take care of it because girls are to be married to some one stranger and their character should not be a problem. Though I do not have girls, I know the families who do not girls to stay out of home after 8 pm., I agree.

 

[youngone]

I wouldn't encourage my son to go after girls at 7, that is perverse! Children should enjoy childhood while they can because it is over quickly. There is plenty of time for girls when they are older.

Double standards are detrimental in any circumstances. How it affects them will depend on the child but I imagine it could make them feel angry and want to rebel.

 

[Hedonologist]

That's just the way it always has been and always will be. I don't personally approve of encouraging 7 year olds to chase girls, but I suppose before long they wouldn't need encouraging anyway!