first time dad, 11 week pregnant fiancee HATES me!

Paddy

New Member
Hi,

As the title suggests im in a bit of a situation.

I'm googling around and this seems to be common but I'm looking for a definite answer to wether my 12 weeks pregnant fiancee has just suddenly decided to hate me or wether its her hormones at this particular stage of her pregnancy.

Basically, I am only 24 and had just graduated university last year and had been focusing on breaking into my given industry ever since. However, since hearing the news I got myself a full time steady job while I do it to be safe.

One day I phoned my usually supportive fiancee and she flipped out on me, telling me that I don't earn enough and that I cant provide. She started insulting my family and my father who, 2 days before suffered from a heart attack. not like her at all.

She wont take in the fact that I only got paid 2 weeks of my last month because I started work after the pay bracket and will be earning over double what I earned last month from here on out along with the weeks pay that they owe me from last month.

she isnt listening to anything. I'm saying things to her and its shes hearing something totally different.

Im lost here.

she's not talking to me other that to brutally tell me to '**** off' and such when i text her.

please somebody tell me this is a phase and will pass!!
 

BigPapa

New Member
If this isn't her normal personality, I think that is more than safe to say it is the pregnancy hormones. I know my wife got a little testy herself, although she would never admit it. The best thing you can do at this point in the game is become a yes man for the next 8 months.
 

Paddy

New Member
I wouldnt say its totally unlike her...

shes always arguing over petty things, knocked up or not... just usually we've made up by now and back to normal. its been 3 days and shes still not talking to me. Ive told her i understand its probs the hormones and that ill be there when she calms down but im still getting the '**** off' texts.

how long is this gonna last? is there just a phase where pregnant women hate there partners?

did your wife suddenly snap out of it one day and start treating you like a human being again?
 

Dad Brad

New Member
Paddy, I feel for you. Hormones bring out the worst in a woman, but it sounds like your situation goes much further. Let her know you love her and care for her, and that you want to do what is right for her and the baby. Let her also know that you are a human being and deserve to be treated as such if this is ever going to work out.
 

Endalia

New Member
Ouch! That's not a good situation to be in. I feel for you, man. I don't know if I wouldn't just try to have a reasonable chat with her as Dad Brad suggested. Even the most even tempered women will sometimes give in to the grumpies when they are pregnant. Those hormones are running wild and I'm sure she is concerned about the welfare of her child.
 

Lorenzo

New Member
Paddy, I have to say this is just a normal phase. Some women tend to be more hormonal than others when they're pregnant. I'm sure she just needs extra care and attention from you. Usually, pregnant women tend to be insecure with their bodies and whatever they can think of. You have to constantly assure her that you love her unconditionally.
 

Paddy

New Member
Thanks guys, took your advice and i think I've weathered the storm ...for now.

I didnt speak to her for the last 2 days other to text things like "i love you" once or twice. she replied with the usual angry "get out of my life, i mean it were ****in over" stuff. But today she was back to her normal self and sed she was so glad that i sent those texts so she knew i wasnt pissed off and had given up on her.

phew...

please tell me it gets easier from here on out!
 

Victor

New Member
I'm glad you guys were able to make up. Here's a helpful hint: never say "Now, honey, I know it's just the hormones...." or any variation thereof. It will just make her angrier.
 

Bear

New Member
Yeah, please don't tell her that it's the hormones or she just might take your head off. Remember that she is worried about providing for the baby, and she isn't really saying that you aren't a good provider or anything like that. Pregnancy does strange things to a woman and they are often overwhelmed by the "big picture".
 

Gavin

New Member
You sound like a very patient man who does love her. That's good. It does sound like her hormones though. Look forward to when she's in the delivery room though. You think she's bad now? LOL
 

Endalia

New Member
Just hang tight and keep telling her you love her. Reassurances will help to let her know you aren't taking the pregnancy as a lark. Love her, hold her, be patient with her, provide for your little family and hope for the best. I don't think things will necessarily get better, just different. But the best thing of all, you're going to be a FATHER! That's the awesome part of the whole thing.
 
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