I just found out my son has been visiting a friend who is the son of one of the biggest drug dealers in our town. I don't know what my wife is thinking. I've called her and talked to her and she said she didn't know. We shall see if she keeps him from going there again. Does your child have friends you wish they didn't have?
Son and His Friend
- Thread starter Hank
- Start date
Mr. Rogers
New Member
My oldest is only nine so we're not at the stage of him having friends that we don't like yet. So far he's friends with the children of who we're friends with so it's all good.
R. Paradon
New Member
Hi Hank!
I am a lot older than you - grandpa status - but I would hop into the situation and make yourself unpopular if need be and stop this friendship. Drug dealer are NOT good friends. PERIOD.
From the way you presented the post I will have to think that you are not living with your wife at this time, but take care of your kids safety and future.
I am a lot older than you - grandpa status - but I would hop into the situation and make yourself unpopular if need be and stop this friendship. Drug dealer are NOT good friends. PERIOD.
From the way you presented the post I will have to think that you are not living with your wife at this time, but take care of your kids safety and future.
flfsurveyor
New Member
I agree with R. Paradon; probably because I am also granpa status. Just think, what happen's if your son's friend's house get's raided by the cops while your son is visiting?
Perhaps, talk directly with your son about this. Maybe he is not aware of his friend's father's business.
Perhaps, talk directly with your son about this. Maybe he is not aware of his friend's father's business.
I guess I am on the fence on this one because you are visiting the sins of the father onto the son. What do you know about this kid? Anything? Are you jumping to conclusions about the son because of what you think you know about his father? Maybe you could just change the friendship so that the kid has to come to your house rather than your son going to his.
I wouldn't let my kids go over to a drug dealer's house but I don't have a problem with them being friends with their kids unless the kids are dealing drugs too. I don't want to pass judgement on the kid just because he belongs to a certain family. You never know, maybe he hates his dad. But you can almost never stop friendships anyway so just keep a cautious eye out.
ghanashyam
New Member
It seems like you must have been divorced and your son must be staying with you exwife. This is the problem that I hate the most in divorce, a difficulty in monitoring the children. Why do not you talk to your son directly? Or you make your ex wife realize the seriousness of the situation.
Have your kid and the drug dealer's son been friends long? Does your child have any other friends that you know of? I agree that you shouldn't jump to conclusions about the friend just yet. I think it's better if you ask your son about him, or better still, ask people who know the family well what they think about the drug dealer's son.
Victor Leigh
New Member
I think the very first thing to do is to make sure that your son doesn't go to his friend's house anymore. Talk directly to your son about it. Explain to him that you have nothing against his friend personally but it's not worth the risk of being caught in a police raid. Stress to your son the horrors of being taken to the police station and being locked up.
Niceness8000
New Member
My son is too young right now. But that is a scary situation. If you don't handle it exactly right, your son may do the opposite just because you say something about it.
I dread this kind of thing, but as a former teen, I know it can happen. Kids don't want to follow their parents' rules, but in this case, there is absolutely no room for error. I feel for the friend, too, but his parent brought this upon him. The world has plenty of people in it to help in avoiding those who have questionable reputations.
My wife and I are currently separated but we will be talking about this. I have already talked to my son and he didn't realize there was a problem. He said that the kid isn't one of his "besties" but he agreed that it would probably be better for the kid to stay at our house rather than go there. I explained about the police and he wants nothing to do with that. Next step is to talk to his mother and tell her the situation. Thanks eveeryone!
Victor Leigh
New Member
Good to hear that you have got a handle on the problem already. The next thing to do is to emphasize to your son that he is not to breath even a word about the drug dealing thing. The last I checked drug dealers are not exactly kindly people and they don't take kindly to people who know what they are doing.
joeldgreat
New Member
Hi, as a parent we all know the dangers of drugs. And if your kid had befriended a drug lord's kid, then I would do all my powers to let my kid stay away from it. Same as others here, I may be judgmental to your kid's friend but the fact that he/she is a drug lord's child, it would always make me fell uncomfortable with it. We can only hope for the best, but we can also do something about it. But if, your child insist then, all you can have to do is to listen and be more vigilant to what your kid is doing.
FrankSinatra
New Member
It depends; what does he sell? And is it good? Because he might get a new customer and a friend for his kid. I guess because I have dealt with a lot of different types of people in my life and don't stereotype I may have a different point of view.
I had 2 drug dealers that were some of my closest friends. They only sold pot and maybe some other stuff if someone specifically asked for it. They were good guys and always there for me; whether it was pot-related or not. They showed up to my wedding, they watched my dogs, and even drove me around when I wrecked my car.
A drug dealer doesn't need to be a bad person; I sold pot in college just so I could get my own stash for free. I don't think it made me any less of a human being and I don't think it changed me.
I had 2 drug dealers that were some of my closest friends. They only sold pot and maybe some other stuff if someone specifically asked for it. They were good guys and always there for me; whether it was pot-related or not. They showed up to my wedding, they watched my dogs, and even drove me around when I wrecked my car.
A drug dealer doesn't need to be a bad person; I sold pot in college just so I could get my own stash for free. I don't think it made me any less of a human being and I don't think it changed me.
I would definitely prevent my kid from going over there. That situation just seems like a disaster waiting to happen. Talk to your sons mother as much as possible about this. Women tend to be very lax with the things like this so its your job to step up and take control of the situation.
I agree with BigPapa.
The father being a drug dealer doesn't necessarily mean that the son will follow in his footsteps or even be anything like his father. I would consider inviting the kid over and talking to him to get an idea of what he's like before jumping to conclusions.
The father being a drug dealer doesn't necessarily mean that the son will follow in his footsteps or even be anything like his father. I would consider inviting the kid over and talking to him to get an idea of what he's like before jumping to conclusions.