A lot of people have the misconception that a temper tantrum in children is just a way for them to get attention. The case is most likely that the child wants something that can’t get. It could be something out of their reach or something that is inhibiting their independence. There are many ways to deal with those uncontrollable tantrums.
Many things can trigger tantrums. They often happen in the worst places and can be very embarrassing to the parents or caregivers. Learning what triggers the tantrums can improve your relationship with your child and make going out in public less stressful.
One thing that often leads to tantrums is your child being tired. In small children, it is very important they have regular naps and get an adequate amount of sleep nightly. It is very common in children under the age of three to have tantrums due to sleep issues. If your child is not taking naps try to get them on a schedule and make sure that they get daily naps. You will see a marked improvement and fewer tantrums.
Tantrums are often a natural part of development in younger children and toddlers. They are exploring their boundaries and when something does not go their way a tantrum will ensue. It is very important in these cases not to ignore your child’s screaming. By helping them with their task and not doing it completely for them, it shows them that you are simply lending a helping hand. That builds trust and calms down your child. For example, if your child is trying to put on a pair of shoes and continues to put them on the wrong foot, show them their error instead of just putting the shoes on for them.
Avoid coddling and babying your child while they are having a tantrum. Most only last a couple of minutes and if you hold them forcefully it will just upset them further. Often times, your child is seeking independence and holding them will just prolong the tantrum. Speak in a soft manner and ask them what you can do to help them. If it is a young child, they may not understand what you are saying but will recognize the friendly tone of your voice. Allow the child to come to you for support as that will make them feel the independence that they are seeking.
Using a time out can be very effective with older children who are having tantrums. If you are out in public and your child starts having a meltdown simply remove them from the situation. Simply take them to the car and making them sit there for a few minutes in a time out. That will give them time to reflect on their actions and inappropriate behavior.
Even with the best of intentions, tantrums will still happen periodically. Learning what triggers them is a great way to minimize the effects. One sign that helps is knowing the body language of your child. Once you learn the pre-tantrum body language and actions it will make it easier to deal with the actual tantrum.