Baby is due soon and feeling a bit unprepared and overwhelmed

dafoester

New Member
Hey everyone, My girlfriend and I are expecting our first child, a little girl, on or around December 3rd.

I have been unemployed for the last three months. I landed a new job and I begin work on November 5th. I am excited and relieved that I will be able to once again provide for my family financially.

When I was in my previous position I was planning on taking a week off after the baby was born. My new employer is aware that I am expecting a child, but we have not had an at length discussion on the amount of time that I will be allowed to take off after the arrival of our daughter. I am a bit concerned about leaving my girlfriend alone all day. In your opinion, what's a reasonable amount of time to request off after the baby is born?

I feel as though we were very prepared for the birth of our daughter, but over the last few days I have felt a bit panicked about our being prepared. The nursery is complete, we have completed childbirth class, and the birth plan is finalized. We have everything that we could possibly need for this child, yet I feel unprepared.

Is this normal for a first time dad?
 

Bear

New Member
Yes, that is absolutely normal. With the Family Medical Leave Act you can request up to six weeks off and there is nothing your employer can do about it, but it is unpaid time off. I don't think that any employer would think requesting a week off is excessive.
 

BigPapa

New Member
This definitely a normal reaction and it will only get stronger the closer you get to the birth. I would just take a deep breath and try to enjoy the last few months of uninterrupted sleep before the baby comes. Be thankful that you are so prepared and that you have a new job to provide for your family.
 

Victor

New Member
Congratulations on the new job! I bet that took a load off your mind. As for your apprehension, it's totally normal; everyone feels scared when the time gets near. Trust me that you and your girlfriend will be just fine.
 

Endalia

New Member
Your anxiety is just beginning. Sorry to say it, but that's about it. When you have children you worry. I could expound upon this but I won't. I think if you talk to your new boss and let him know you wish to take off when your child is born he will be understanding especially if he has kids.
 

Victor

New Member
Haha, way to add to it, Endalia! ;) He'll learn soon enough how much anxiety children inspire in their parents.

I agree that the boss (unless he's a complete jerk) will understand taking a week off. That's actually very little time after a new baby is born. The only problem is since you are new, it may be unpaid time since you haven't had a chance to accrue much paid time.
 

Lorenzo

New Member
I feel as though we were very prepared for the birth of our daughter, but over the last few days I have felt a bit panicked about our being prepared. The nursery is complete, we have completed childbirth class, and the birth plan is finalized. We have everything that we could possibly need for this child, yet I feel unprepared.

Is this normal for a first time dad?
Don't worry about it, you'll be fine. When my wife and I had our first child, we also didn't know what to do. But you know what, being a dad will come to you naturally. It may seem overwhelming at first, but you will enjoy every minute of it. Believe me, I have five kids.
 

Endalia

New Member
It is one of those things that you make up as you go along. A baby doesn't come with an instruction manual but things will be fine.
 

Gavin

New Member
I think a week is a very reasonable request, even if you did just start the job. Congratulations on that BTW. It's tough to find work out there.
 

Andersson

New Member
From what I remember most companies have set dates that should be listed within your company handbook. I would sit down with the boss and tell them this is something that you need to take care of, also ask for friends and family to help out. I am sure they are more than willing.
 

Don

New Member
If you can afford to take the time off, I would take off for the entire week. I remember how exhausted we both were after those first few days at home. You will need at least a week to get settled in and it will still be a challenge for awhile after that.
 

Michael

New Member
I used to think I was going to kill our child by not knowing what to do when she started throwing up that milk. It came out her nose and mouth, and I was scared beyond being frightened. We got through it. You will, too.
 
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