My girlfriend is now 28 weeks and it seems as though she is getting more and moe emotional as the weeks go by. This is our 1st baby, and she is 10 years younger than me. I guess the answers I am looking for our what are the expectations of a new father to be? I feel as though I have given her everything she needs and wants, from upgrading to a house, trading in my car, planning our financial future and taking part in every decision and baby responsibility. Yet, I am not sweet or pampering enough?? When she is at her emotional highs and proceeds to tell me how insensitive or how selfish I am, I tend to be defensive and it makes matters worse. Is this an issue of immaturity (she is 29) or is it typical pregnant behavior? Either way, it is stressful and doing a number on our relationship. How do you dads handle situations like these?
Father to be expectations
- Thread starter Bigboy
- Start date
Victor Leigh
New Member
Hey, 29 is not young anymore.
She's supposed to be an adult at that age. However, I don't think you should be too upset with her behavior. I have seen some pregnant women who really take full advantage of their condition to make unreasonable demands. Do what you can but you don't have to give in to everything she wants. There's such a thing as listening and not taking things to heart.
Give that a try.
She's supposed to be an adult at that age. However, I don't think you should be too upset with her behavior. I have seen some pregnant women who really take full advantage of their condition to make unreasonable demands. Do what you can but you don't have to give in to everything she wants. There's such a thing as listening and not taking things to heart.
Give that a try.
Some women are worse than others when they are pregnant, especially if they were prone to emotionally unstable behavior before the pregnancy. It sounds to me like she is probably your average pregnant woman, overwhelmed with feelings/emotions she's never experienced before. Try to comfort her as much as you can, but stand your ground if she becomes unreasonable.
Just bite your tongue and let it go man! Most of the time she doesn't mean it and she is just scared. I hate to tell you but the closer delivery gets the worse it will be. Just assure her that you love her, and try to do what you can to keep her happy. The woman you used to know is still in there, and still loves you. 
Don't worry, all pregnant women are like this. This is only a phase, so I suggest you just learn to be more understanding with her needs and demands. Pregnancy is the time when women are at their most sensitive. They think weird things, act or talk without thinking (most of the time). Just like what everyone here said, show her extra affection and attention. She needs these the most.
Oh, I was afraid to tell him that, but it's true. The last trimester is very tough in that regard. Just hang on for now!Just bite your tongue and let it go man! Most of the time she doesn't mean it and she is just scared. I hate to tell you but the closer delivery gets the worse it will be. Just assure her that you love her, and try to do what you can to keep her happy. The woman you used to know is still in there, and still loves you.
joeldgreat
New Member
Except for the last one, most of the things you've mentioned here are all material things. I'm just wondering if the emotional needs of your partner was fully taken care of. Anyway, welcome to the real world of being a family man.
That is a good point, Joel. Sometimes men's ideas of being sweet are vastly different than women's, and it leads to quite a few misunderstandings. Bigboy, at some point when your girlfriend is calm, ask her to tell you specifically what you can do to help her. Maybe she'll be able to give you some good ideas.
Also, when my wife was pregnant with our first, she told me something interesting. She trusted and loved me and knew I wouldn't leave her, but once she was pregnant she felt very vulnerable. She said the hormones made her feel that it was more likely I would leave (and leave her with a baby to boot) or cheat, because why would I want to stay with someone who is knocked up? She knew it was irrational and never taxed me with it, but it was something she felt.
Also, when my wife was pregnant with our first, she told me something interesting. She trusted and loved me and knew I wouldn't leave her, but once she was pregnant she felt very vulnerable. She said the hormones made her feel that it was more likely I would leave (and leave her with a baby to boot) or cheat, because why would I want to stay with someone who is knocked up? She knew it was irrational and never taxed me with it, but it was something she felt.
makingloot
New Member
She's supposed to be an adult at that age. However, I don't think you should be too upset with her behavior. I have seen some pregnant women who really take full advantage of their condition to make unreasonable demands. Do what you can but you don't have to give in to everything she wants. There's such a thing as listening and not taking things to heart. It's hard, but really you just have to bite your tongue most of the time. Also, I know you probably don't feel much like it, but try giving her a back rub or pamper her in some other way that focuses solely on her. Perhaps doing something like that regularly will help.