Resentful of Kids?

[Victor]

Have you ever been resentful of your kids? What caused the resentment and how did you resolve the situation? Did the kids pick up on it?

 

[tommymac]

I have had times when I've been resentful of the kids for having all the attention of my wife. I felt bad about it for a while, because it started to feel like a "them against me" situation. It felt like the only way I could interact with my wife was through the kids. Talking about it with my wife helped, especially establishing a night a month as a "date night".

 

[Lorenzo]

Yes, there are times when I get resentful with the children, especially when they act like they don't care about my and my wife's feelings. It's like we do everything for them but we don't get anything in return, not even appreciation.

Normally, when I start to feel any sign of resentment, I talk to my wife about it, and we talk to the kids (or to a specific child, when the situation calls for it) and try to come up with a win-win solution.

 

[BigDaddy]

I think kids get resentful of the relationship I have with my wife. Then they push to get their space and I end up feeling resentment because they are always there in the middle of us and my wife doesnt see it.

 

[taskeinc]

I've never been resentful of my kids and could never imaging that ever happening. Oftentimes, there can be a type of competition between a husband and wife (dad and mom) as they compete for the children's affection, and that is not healthy for the relationship. If you somehow resent your children because it takes away time between you and your spouse, that's not healthy either. From the time my son, and 15 months later my daughter, came out of their mom's womb, they were top priority in my life.

 

[Foster]

I've never been resentful of my kids, my wife however has. I give my children a lot of attention and between that and work it doesn't always leave enough time for my wife.

 

[youngone]

I have felt a sense of resentment in the past, I think that is normal. I resent not having the weekend to myself and sometimes I wish I had no commitments because I am still young. I'm also jealous of my son's youth, I wish I was his age, haha!

 

[ghanashyam]

This has happened many times, children have a very short view of the life and the way of life that is the reason.
Usually, it takes hard line to be taken at making them understand that world is not all his, that others have a right to live and enjoy also.

 

[Niceness8000]

No, I have not felt any real resentment toward my son yet. Every now and then I wish that I had some of the same freedoms I had before he was born, but it's not so strong that I wish I can turn back the clock. For me, a life with kids has different opportunities to look forward to. I still view it as a blessing for me.

 

[Victor Leigh]

No, not me. I have no reason to. My children are the treasures of my life. They are my hope for the future. If they do better than me, then my dreams are fulfilled. No, I don't resent my children.

 

[JRDeep]

I was jealous of my son when he was getting all the attention from my wife. I can't say I actually resented him though. I just felt like i was being pushed to the side for a bit.

The was I see it, I helped make him. The love he got early on was the same love I felt from my by wife before. I'm just greedy. want that woman all to myself. I've come to terms with having to share her with the kids though. lol

 

[Hedonologist]

The children didn't ask to be born. I haven't ever felt resentful and don't think I would. Even if they did cause me grief it would be at least somewhat due to my parenting.

 

[themdno]

I've never resented my kids, directly. I've resented myself for having them, I've resented my wife for paying more attention to them. But, in none of those situations is it the kids fault. Those are our problems. The kids didn't ask to be here, we brought them here.

I think those feelings are normal, as long as they aren't permeating your life.

 

[Victor]

I think I'm just tired. My oldest is almost 3 years old and still doesn't sleep well. We almost never have time without the kids; one or the other is always awake while we are.

We just need a break. Maybe it's time to drop them off with my mother-in-law overnight, since we haven't done that in awhile.