I worked with this guy who has three children. His wife doesn't work. He made a good salary in education, but he was always broke and bumming money off others. Now he has lost his job and has to work in a grocery store. He keeps sending e-mails to all the people he used to work with and goes around from church to church asking for money to live on. I run into him when I go to buy groceries, and all I want to do is tell him to learn to budget his money, even if his wife needs to go to work. Instead, I keep quite because I know it will do no good. In a few weeks, we'll all get more e-mails.
How do you tell someone?
- Thread starter Dad Brad
- Start date
The guy doesn't sound like he has any money to budget to me. Working at a grocery store he probably only makes minimum wage. As for his wife, my wife stays home too even though I am now unemployed. Childcare is a HUGE expense, and if my wife went to work at a full-time job around here we would actually lose money. She would be PAYING to go to work.
Was your friend always this way? Even when he had a good-paying job, did he still act like he needed help financially? I'm thinking maybe he needed his friends' monetary help now since he just lost his job, but eventually when he's able to earn more, he would stop asking for anyone's help.
The economy is in horrible shape. That being said, you need to let him know everyone is having difficulty making ends meet today and you can't help him. It is true and no one wants to have less than they need in the money department even if it means you are saving the money and not spending it.
Since he has three children, it's probably best that his wife doesn't work, as daycare usually runs $150+ per child per week here. That would be up to $450/week in daycare, if all 3 kids are under the age of 5. Like Bear pointed out, the wife would be paying to go to work unless she could make more than $11.25/hour after taxes. As for the husband, maybe he wasn't budgeting his money well when he had a good salary, or maybe they had a lot of legitimate debt, it's not for us to say, but now that he's working in a grocery store, he's probably not making more than about $7 or $8/hour - whatever minimum wage is there. Assuming he gets 40 hours/week, which is highly unlikely, he's still only making about $320 week BEFORE taxes, and after they take taxes out, do you really think that's enough to pay a mortgage, utilities, possible car payment, car insurance, put gas in the car, AND feed a family of five?I worked with this guy who has three children. His wife doesn't work. He made a good salary in education, but he was always broke and bumming money off others. Now he has lost his job and has to work in a grocery store. He keeps sending e-mails to all the people he used to work with and goes around from church to church asking for money to live on. I run into him when I go to buy groceries, and all I want to do is tell him to learn to budget his money, even if his wife needs to go to work. Instead, I keep quite because I know it will do no good. In a few weeks, we'll all get more e-mails.
Glad to see there are still some people in the world who understand basic economics. I am still unemployed inspite of 50-60 applications sent in the past 6 weeks or so. My in-laws are pushing me to take a part-time job for minimum wage for someone they know. The work isn't steady, and if I worked it for a week I would lose my unemployment benefits and we would be in a worse position than we are now. They just don't get it!Since he has three children, it's probably best that his wife doesn't work, as daycare usually runs $150+ per child per week here. That would be up to $450/week in daycare, if all 3 kids are under the age of 5. Like Bear pointed out, the wife would be paying to go to work unless she could make more than $11.25/hour after taxes. As for the husband, maybe he wasn't budgeting his money well when he had a good salary, or maybe they had a lot of legitimate debt, it's not for us to say, but now that he's working in a grocery store, he's probably not making more than about $7 or $8/hour - whatever minimum wage is there. Assuming he gets 40 hours/week, which is highly unlikely, he's still only making about $320 week BEFORE taxes, and after they take taxes out, do you really think that's enough to pay a mortgage, utilities, possible car payment, car insurance, put gas in the car, AND feed a family of five?
This is a guy you used to work with, right. He's not really your friend, just more of an aquaintance. If you feel it neccessary to help in some way, but not by actually giving money, I like the idea Mel suggested by referring him to credit counseling. Or maybe you could find a list of non-profit agencies that could help with basics.
If this situation is just annoying to you and you don't want to be bothered, stop taking his emails and just tell him, you wish you could help more, but it's hard for everyone right now.
I am fortunate to have a good, stable job, and my wife works a little part-time as well. It would be extremely hard for me to ask anyone for help.
If this situation is just annoying to you and you don't want to be bothered, stop taking his emails and just tell him, you wish you could help more, but it's hard for everyone right now.
I am fortunate to have a good, stable job, and my wife works a little part-time as well. It would be extremely hard for me to ask anyone for help.