Being Their Own Person

[youngdad]

I've been thinking about child-rearing lately and it's caused me to have a lot of questions. I know kids want to fit in with the crowd and be popular, but I want my son to be his own person and make his own decisions, even if they go against the crowd. Does anyone has any suggestions as to how to approach teaching a child to do that?

 

[2andalone]

My suggestion is to start early with letting him make some small decisions. When you talk about something, ask for his opinion first and encourage him to have this opinion. Ask him about things he likes and encourage him to like these things. I think that a little encouragement goes a long way.

 

[Pascallist]

That's good advice. Let your son know that if he tried too hard to please everybody, he would end up pleasing no one. Be yourself and the world will be your friend. I believe the old saying still applies now.

 

[Dan]

Don't encourage him to go against the crowd too much unless it's drugs or alcohol. Kids seem to be really brutal these days or maybe it's just that more bullying is making it into the news.

 

[Salazar]

I think kids find themselves as long as they aren't stifled. It's important to lay down a solid foundation of rules, but beyond that it's good to encourage them to think for themselves.

 

[Len]

I would say that bullying is going to happen whether your kid goes against the crowd or not. I say tell him he can do what he wants. Other people have opinions and might voice them, but that doesn't mean we have to conform to be like them. We should seek to be unlike those who condemn and judge.

 

[Luke]

Don't encourage him to go against the crowd too much unless it's drugs or alcohol. Kids seem to be really brutal these days or maybe it's just that more bullying is making it into the news.

I have to totally disagree with this statement. Doing the right thing is rarely ever the "popular" decision. I personally don't want my kid going along with the crowd doing something they feel or know is morally wrong to "fit in" or because they knew it probably wasn't right, but drugs and alcohol weren't involved so it must be okay to go along with it.

 

[GranddadHoward]

We taught our kids to think for themselves and be their own person. It made it a lot easier for them because they weren't afraid to speak up and tell classmates no if they felt they shouldn't do something. I think bullies target kids who they perceive as weak, rather than those who stand up and say no if they do not want to do something or don't think something is right.

 

[Bear]

I think that if you listen to yuor child and encourage their interests they will grow up to be strong individually minded individuals. I have no plans whatsoever to raise sheeple. I want my kids to think for themselves.