Tricky Situation

[proudpapa]

I am married to a woman who already had kids and we are now expecting my first child. Some people say that it's different when you have your own child, that I need to be careful not show more affection to the new baby. How do you prepare a 9 and 10 year old for this?

 

[jason]

Not sure how to prepare a child that old. We told her daughter along the way, who is three about it. We got her used to the idea, and even bought her a baby doll for her the day he was born.

As far as feelings. I'm nervous around babies period. Before my son, I did not hold a child that young. Maybe closer to a year was what I was comfortable holding. We also had a child with special needs, which has me more on edge then I may have been otherwise. But I do not love our daughter any less then before.

 

[Jerry F]

In my book, a kid is a kid. I don't make any difference in our blended family. I love my step son as much as I do my son and it's all the same to me. I love both of them very much. I have seen some people though, who cannot do the same.

 

[RandysDad]

You have to be really, really careful to not let this happen. With the divorce rate being so high in this country, we have more and more blended families. In other words, blended families are becoming the norm. I don't have any step kids but I think it would be a matter of challenging yourself to be fair.

 

[Aiden]

That's a hard question to answer. One thing to keep in mind is to make sure you still give plenty of attention and have alone time with the 10 year old. Let them know they are just as special and you love them the same. Ask for their help with the new baby. Kids love feeling involved.